Ron: Thanks for dropping by my blog and volunteering for an interview.
Janie: No problem, Ron. I’m stupid like that. I just love opening myself up for ridicule, derision, and laughter. I figure, if they’re talking about me, they’re giving someone else a break.
(we're really not talking. I just imagined myself on some interview show. What? Jerry Springer? No! Please! Make it...Larry King Live or something like that. I like all those little lights in the background. The lighting flatters my face and makes me look years younger.)
Ron: Question #1:
How in the world did you find my blog and what made you click on it?
Janie: Because I’m Warped like that! Get it? I clicked on the The Warped Mind of Ron because I’m warped and warps attract? Nahhhh. I think I scammed on through the crazy and zany Vodka Mom. No, wait, maybe it was Sabrae. Oh, heck. I dunno. I piggybacked onto one of your readers, then decided to follow. Just be glad I came by and graced you with my stupid royal assedness. I’m sure your good U.S. bank account will benefit in some way. Some time. You know, like when one of my relatives whom I didn’t know I had, and by the way, was rich as Croesus, kicks the bucket and I have to have some safe place in which to deposit said funds because the government’s trying to abscond with the family jewels. And I’ll split it with you 90/10. Me 90, you 10. Are you good with that?
Ron: Question #2: What inspired you to start blogging in the first place?
Janie: Oh, the twisted trails we take, all to further twist the tale. I would write stories about our trips and family life, which is Way Twisted, and send them to my customers. They loved them (they said!) (I didn’t pay them, I promise) and kept after me to write more. Then, somehow, I happened onto a local blog from one hilarious guy, Eric at The FireAnt Gazette. He has the driest sense of humor! And I was hooked, read it daily, and then read all of his linky love. A year later, I finally hopped into the blogworld as a pseudo-wannabe-blogger. Not much has changed. I’m still a wanna-be. Though I still send twisted stories to my customers, ‘cause that’s how I roll.
Ron: Question #3: For whatever reason you have no time to do any of your normal Holiday decorating or rituals. If given the time to have one decoration or ritual only what would it be?
Janie: Seriously? What is normal? I don’t do normal. And really, I have no time to do any Holiday decorating this year. Don’t even have a tree up. Bah freaking humbug. Zanna would shred everything anyway. Wonder if decorating Zack the Wonder Dog and Zanna the Wonder Pup will suffice? I’m trying my hardest to keep my head in the Christmas game, what with ThatManILove being gone for over three months now. I figure if I bought the presents, got them wrapped (thanks, Cherie!) and delivered them, I’d be knocking it outa the park. Ovah da fence. You know.
Anyhoo…One thing we always do is adopt families (or last year, four!) for Christmas, and that is still happening. It’s fun, and a blessing to us as well as the receiver. And I think that’s what Christmas is all about – loving on people. And we donate to our local Big Brothers Big Sisters, an organization in which I totally believe, having been a single mom myself. But, enough. You don’t really wanna hear all that stuff.
Ron: Question #4:
Do you have a favorite Christmas Carol and if so what is it?
Janie: I don’t really have a favorite Christmas Carol, I like them all. But my favorite song of all time, Christmas or otherwise, is “Mary, Did You Know?”, written by Mark Lowry. Here it is for your viewing pleasure. I'll hum along.
Mary did you know that your baby boy will one day walk on water?
Mary did you know that your baby boy will save our sons and daughters?
Did you know that your baby boy has come to make you new?
This child that you've delivered, will soon deliver you.
Mary did you know that your baby boy will give sight to a blind man?
Mary did you know that your baby boy will calm a storm with his hand?
Did you know that your baby boy has walked where angels trod?
And when you kiss your little baby, you have kissed the face of God.
The blind will see, the deaf will hear and the dead will live again.
The lame will leap, the dumb will speak, the praises of the lamb.
Mary did you know that your baby boy is Lord of all creation?
Mary did you know that your baby boy will one day rule the nations?
Did you know that your baby boy is heaven's perfect Lamb?
This sleeping child you're holding is the great I am.
Ron: Question #5:
What bank do you use and what is your account #'s..... wait... that may be inappropriate?
Janie: Well, I could give you all my Nigerian friend’s bank accounts…but you’d have to share all your information. I mean their information. You could send it to JanieSoundingForthIWannaMakeBigBucks@NotANigerianScam.com(Iwantyourmoney@hotmail.com).
Ron: What blogger from your regular visitors do you really hope volunteers to be your victim, ummm I mean interviewed?
Janie: I hope that everyone of them wants to be interviewed - and I promise to ask nice…well, sort of nice…not mean, anyway…questions!! Braja, Vodka Mom, Eric, and the Dooze. But she’s incognito, so I’d have to publish hers.
Ron: This question thing is harder than it sounds :-)
Janie: What? Asking, or answering? Are you freakin’ pre-judging me? I belong to Womensa. My I.Q. is through the ceiling…of the doghouse. And, by the way, is by no means related to the number of daily hot flashes experienced. I can ask questions. See? Like these. I can SO play this game.
Janie: What color are your shoes? Is your favorite book "See Spot Run"? Do you know Dick and Jane?
Ron: Thanks for playing along and have a very Merry Christmas.
Let me know. I can aska da questions. I can. I can.