Wednesday, April 2, 2008

Miles and Miles

Oh, my Lord. I’m exhausted. We went to 8 different offices today to call on customers. All of the visits were good, and that’s somewhat normal for my day, seeing that many customers…

Except…

We’re in Denver! Downtown Denver. The Mile High City. Which translates to tons and tons and miles of walking. And I’m old…and decrepit. Funny, I never thought of myself as that way, until today.

We had a 7 a.m. breakfast date with one customer, then an 8:15 appointment with another…about 7 blocks away, all up a steep hill.

Young Salesman: We have a trek ahead of us. This hill is killer.

Janie: I can (huff, puff) see that.

Young Salesman: When I first moved here last year from Houston, I would make this hill, and I thought I was going to die.

Janie: (Not speaking, because. I. Can’t.) (I think I am dying!) (But I’m still trying to look contained and in control, breathing regularly – when he’s not looking – because, you know, image is freakin’ everything.)

Young Salesman: (not even breathing hard) But I got over it quickly, ‘cause around here, you walk everywhere. It’s crazy when it’s icy and snowy, trying to navigate this hill.

Janie: (Still not speaking, trying to breathe and keep up with young whippersnapper: God, I think I might just fire him. Navigate the hill, hell, it’s a beautiful day and I can’t even navigate it!)

Young Salesman: The altitude and cold combined can wreak havoc on your body. One day this year, it was so cold, when I got to my office, I think my sinuses were frozen. They hurt so bad.


Janie: (What? Did he say his sinuses were frozen? I’m freakin’ burning up here! I tried to get you to let me leave my coat in the office, young fellow!)

Young Salesman: Sorry (as he leaves me behind), I'm a pretty fast walker.

Janie: (Not speaking, but wondering, “Do you think it would violate the sexual harrassment laws if you just carried me the rest of the way? I’ll give you a raise!”)

We make it to the 8:15 with minutes to spare, and have a great visit.

Then we leave for our 9 a.m. appointment.

Janie: Where to now, senor?

Young Salesman: Oh, we have to go to John’s office – it’s only about a mile and a half away.

Janie: Let’s get to it! Places to be, people to see! (Oh, yeah, I’m such a motivator!)(Do they have a recliner? I need a nap!)

He was a perfect gentleman, but he’s probably laughing his ass off tonight regaling his wife with stories of his out of shape lady boss. And tomorrow’s another day!

I have to go, I’m about to submit my online application to AARP...if I can find the strength to do so.

11 comments:

Chris McClure aka Panhandle Poet said...

I love downtown Denver but I agree about the walking. I hope you got dinner at The Palms.

Lone Chatelaine said...

I love Denver. Doesn't downtown have that trolley line? We walked a lot, but that trolley saved my life a couple times, for sure.

Anonymous said...

Just so you know.....it's not the walking--it's the Altitude!!!!
We go there a lot, DIA is only 2 1/2 hrs from KANSAS!

Lori said...

Good for you for takin' that hill. Wonder what the whippersnapper would've done if you'd stopped cold, clutched your chest and said "Dear Lord I think it's the big one!", you know, just for April fools.

Karen Townsend said...

When my sister moved to Denver with her husband in the 1980's, I heard the altitude stories!

She lives in Montana now!

Snooty Primadona said...

Just thank your lucky stars that it wasn't San Francisco! I know downtown Denver well, Bless Your Heart!

Epsom salts anyone?

That Janie Girl said...

Chris - I didn't get dinner at the Palms, but you can bet I will next time!

Chatelaine - we rode the bus one time...to another restaurant.

Terri - thanks. I thought I was just getting old. Next time I go up we'll have to coordinate!

PresbyGal - Oh, Lord, that would have been hilarious...I think!!

Karen - I know I bitch about the traffic and humidity in Houston, but...I might like it better!

Snooty - you know, I wasn't even sore? I can't believe it!!

Cherie said...

LMAO!!!!! but quietly so as not to wake young son. I guess that explains the big box holding a piece of interesting exercise equipment. If Midland had a couple good sized hills to tromp up & down it would help....

That Janie Girl said...

Ah, yes...interesting exercise equipment. We'll put it together later, and...um...hang clothes on it.

Rae said...

ugh Hill! I hate walking up hills!

thisisme said...

Ouch - hills like that are evil!

I'm very impressed that you weren't even sore.